WHEN IT COMES to critiquing Islam, critics do not just see violence in the actions of Prophet Muhammadsa during times of war, but also in other teachings, such as those related to women. The narrative is that Islam is a violent religion in every aspect, including in its treatment of women. In this chapter, we will prove that women hold such great respect and honor in Islam that is unparalleled in all other teachings, religions, and ideologies. First, it must be understood that the Holy Quran treats men and women as equals in the sight of God. The reward for good works is the same for both males and females:
Whoso does good whether male or female, and is a believer, shall enter Paradise and they shall not be wronged a whit.127
Of the believers whoso acts righteously, whether male or female, We will surely grant such a one a pure life; and We will certainly reward them according to the measure of the best of their works.128
The Holy Quran also assigns a very high status and position to mothers:
And We have enjoined on man to be good to his parents. His mother bears him with pain, and brings him forth with pain. And the bearing of him and his weaning takes thirty months, till, when he attains his full maturity and reaches the age of forty years, he says, ‘My Lord, grant me the power that I may be grateful for Thy favour which Thou hast bestowed upon me and upon my parents, and that I may do such good works as may please Thee. And make my seed righteous for me. I do turn to Thee; and, truly, I am of those who submit to Thee.’129
Prophet Muhammadsa was so ahead of his time that in a land where women were thought of as property and considered a dishonor, he gave them the rights and honor that would not be given to them by non-Muslims even centuries afterwards. He said:
The best of you is the one who is best to his wife, and I am the best of you to my wives.130
You will be rewarded for whatever you spend for Allah’s sake even if it were a morsel which you put in your wife’s mouth.131
Paradise lies at the feet of your mother.132
Similarly, once a person asked Prophet Muhammadsa who is the most deserving of best treatment by him, and he responded, “Your mother”. He was asked, “Then who else after that?” He said, “Your mother”. He again asked, “Then who else after that?” He replied for the third-time, “Your mother”. When he was persistently asked again the fourth time, he said, “Your father”.133 If anything, the status of a man (a father) is lesser here as compared to that of a woman (a mother). In a similar way, regarding the status of daughters and sisters, Prophet Muhammadsa is reported to have said:
Whoever had a daughter born to him… and he did not prefer his son over her, Allah will admit him to Paradise because of her.134
There is no one who has three daughters, or three sisters, and he treats them well, except that he enters paradise.135
I will enter the Garden with someone who brings up two daughters until they come of age, and we will be like these two (and he indicated this with his index finger and middle finger joined together).136
Prophet Muhammadsa also highly praised equal treatment of daughters as illustrated by this narration:
A woman entered upon ‘Ā'ishahra with her two daughters, and she gave her three dates. (The woman) gave each of her daughters a date, then she split the last one between them. She (‘Ā'ishahra) said, “Then Prophet Muhammadsa came and I told him about that”. He said, “Why are you surprised? She will enter Paradise because of that”.137
Prophet Muhammadsa also encouraged his followers to spend on family as he said:
There are four dinars: a dinar which you give to a poor person, a dinar you give to free a slave, a dinar you spend in the Way of Allah, and a dinar which you spend on your family. The best of them is the dinar which you spend on your family.138
Prophet Muhammadsa himself had wives and daughters and he treated them very kindly and gave us an excellent model in terms of acting on these teachings and his personal precept. Due to this kind and compassionate treatment, history attests to the fact that all the wives of Prophet Muhammadsa were devoted to him. One example that illustrates this fact is that of Hazrat Maimūnara who cherished her first meeting with Prophet Muhammadsa as a great memory. She lived for many years after the death of Prophet Muhammadsa and had great appreciation for the time she spent in marriage with Prophet Muhammadsa. At the time of her death at the age of 80, she asked to be buried at precisely the spot where she had first met Prophet Muhammadsa. This shows the great degree of love she had for him and how the decades that passed since that first meeting did not diminish the significance of that memory in her mind.
Prophet Muhammadsa would regularly seek the counsel of his wives in all important matters. He helped them in household chores and cared for them. His compassion extended to mothers in general and this is illustrated by the fact that on one occasion, when he heard a child crying during a prayer service, he quickly concluded the service. He explained later that he was concerned that the child’s crying may cause distress to the mother, if the prayer service had been long.
He was also kind to women at large. During any of his journeys, if women were travelling with the caravan, he would give instructions that they should move at a gentler pace and take breaks to ensure their comfort. Once during a battle, there was some confusion and the animals became agitated and unmanageable. Prophet Muhammadsa fell from his horse and some women also fell. A companion ran towards him to help him as his foot got stuck in the stirrup. Prophet Muhammadsa managed to get his foot out quickly and said to his companion, “Do not worry about me, go and help women”. At the time of his death, one of his last injunctions to Muslims was that they should treat women with kindness and consideration.139
All these examples show how much Prophet Muhammadsa emphasized equal, dignified, and good treatment of women, and demonstrated this with his own excellent model. Given this context, it is hard to assume that Islam violently oppresses women.