Marriage of Ḥafṣah bint ‘Umar(ra) - Sha‘bān 3 A.H.

Ḥaḍrat ‘Umar(ra) had a daughter by the name of Ḥafṣah(ra), who was married to a faithful Companion, Khanīs bin Ḥudhāfah, who had taken part in the Battle of Badr. After Badr, upon returning to Madīnah, Khanīs fell ill and was unable to recover from his illness.1 Some time after his demise, Ḥaḍrat ‘Umar(ra) began to feel a sense of concern for her second marriage. At the time, Ḥafṣah(ra) was over twenty years of age.2 Due to his simplicity in nature, Ḥaḍrat ‘Umar(ra) met ‘Uthmān bin ‘Affān(ra) himself and mentioned that his daughter Ḥafṣah(ra) was now a widow, and that if he was interested, he could marry her. However, Ḥaḍrat ‘Uthmān(ra) avoided the subject. After this, Ḥaḍrat ‘Umar(ra) mentioned it to Ḥaḍrat Abū Bakr(ra), but he too remained silent and did not respond.3 At this Ḥaḍrat ‘Umar(ra) was deeply saddened, and in this very state of dismay, he presented himself before the Holy Prophet(sa) and submitted the entire account. The Holy Prophet(sa) responded, “O ‘Umar! Do not worry at all, if Allāh so wills, Ḥafṣah shall find a better husband than ‘Uthmān and Abū Bakr; and ‘Uthmān shall receive a better wife than Ḥafṣah.”4 The Holy Prophet(sa) said this because he had already intended to marry Ḥafṣah(ra) and to give his own daughter Ummi Kulthūm(ra) to Ḥaḍrat ‘Uthmān(ra) in marriage. Both Ḥaḍrat ‘Uthmān(ra) and Ḥaḍrat Abū Bakr(ra) were aware of this and this is why they turned down the proposal of Ḥaḍrat ‘Umar(ra). Some time thereafter, the Holy Prophet(sa) married his daughter Ummi Kulthūm(ra) to Ḥaḍrat ‘Uthmān(ra), and this has already been mentioned above. Following this, the Holy Prophet(sa) sent a proposal himself to Ḥaḍrat ‘Umar(ra) for Ḥafṣah(ra). What more could Ḥaḍrat ‘Umar(ra) have asked for? He very happily accepted this proposal.5 In Sha‘bān 3 A.H., Ḥaḍrat Ḥafṣah(ra) was married to the Holy Prophet(sa) and became a part of his household.6 When this marriage had taken place, Ḥaḍrat Abū Bakr(ra) said to Ḥaḍrat ‘Umar(ra)

“Perhaps your heart has been saddened on my account. The fact is, that I was already aware of the intention of the Holy Prophet(sa), but I could not reveal his secret without permission. Of course, if the Holy Prophet(sa) had not intended so, I would have most gladly married Ḥafṣah.”7

One special wisdom in marrying Ḥafṣah(ra) was that she was the daughter of Ḥaḍrat ‘Umar(ra), who one could say was considered to be the most eminent Companion after Ḥaḍrat Abū Bakr(ra), and he was from among the most intimate friends of the Holy Prophet(sa). Hence, in order to further strengthen mutual relations and to compensate the grief of Ḥaḍrat ‘Umar(ra) and Ḥafṣah(ra), which they had sustained by the untimely demise of Khanīs bin Ḥudhāfah(ra), the Holy Prophet(sa) deemed it appropriate to marry Ḥafṣah(ra) himself. Another general wisdom under consideration was that if the Holy Prophet(sa) had a greater number of wives, the tasks of preaching and propagation, as well as education and training, could be performed on a much wider scale with greater ease, and in a more excellent manner among the women - who constitute half, if not, more than half of the world’s population in some respects.

With regards to the issue of polygamy, a fundamental discussion has already been taken up whilst alluding to the marriage of Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishah(ra). At this instance, it need not be repeated, but it would not be out of place to mention that the restrictions which are stipulated by Islām with regards to polygamy, and which the Holy Prophet(sa) practically adhered to, are such that marrying more than one wife can in no way whatsoever be classified as a means of lust and enjoyment. As a matter of fact, the truth is, that in light of these restrictions, polygamy is a very great sacrifice, which both husband and wife are compelled to offer in the interest of self, family, nation, country or religion. Moreover, a person who offers this sacrifice sits at a far greater distance from domestic peace, comfort, joy and pleasure, than such a person whose wealth, attention, time and apparent, love belongs to one woman alone. Then, it should also be remembered, that a person who marries more than once, being motivated by pleasure and lust, always pays special attention to the food, clothing and lodging, etc., of his wives and provides them as much means as possible for their pleasure and enjoyment. However, in the life of the Holy Prophet(sa) a completely opposite picture is seen. Do not go far, merely open the Qur’an, which is categorically accepted as the most authentic scripture on the biography of the Holy Prophet(sa). On one occasion, when wealth began to flow in from outside of Madīnah, and the Companions began to acquire some financial ease, the wives of the Holy Prophet(sa) submitted that now they should also receive a share of this affluence, and be somewhat compensated for the days of hardship they had spent until now. The Holy Prophet(sa) responded:

“If you desire the life of this world and its wealth and riches, come then I will provide you the wealth of this world. However, in this case you can no longer remain to be my wives (because I wish to keep my life free from the impurity of materialistic wealth). If you desire to remain as my wives, then live with me solely for the sake of God, for my office of prophethood, and for the sake of the hereafter. In that case, you shall receive a magnificent reward from God, which is destined for those who do good.”8

Upon hearing this statement of the Holy Prophet(sa), all of his wives unanimously submitted that God and His Messenger is all that they desired, and not the wealth of this world.9 In the presence of this excellent historical testimony, can it be fathomed that God-forbid, the polygamy practiced by the Holy Prophet(sa) was a means of pleasure and lust? Instead, most definitely, every new wife who came into the home of the Holy Prophet(sa) would increase the domestic burden of the Holy Prophet(sa). Moreover, it was due to the magnificent spirit of sacrifice exhibited by the Holy Prophet(sa), that for the sake of his religion, nation and country, he happily bore all of these hardships, and casting away the peace and tranquility of his life, he lived a completely ascetic life, as if he were a traveller.

Another wisdom in the polygamy practiced by the Holy Prophet(sa) was so that those attachments which are tied to a person in this world may be weakened. It is obvious that in this world, a person possesses many relationships which he must maintain. For example, there are parents, brothers and sisters, the wife and children, friends, neighbours, and so on and so forth. From among all these bonds, emotionally speaking, the most passionate and sensitive relationship is the one of husband and wife. At times, a man’s love for his wife takes on a state which may be generally described as passionate love, and sometimes the ebullience of emotions takes this passionate love to a kind of madness. Then, in such a state, except for spending an entire life preoccupied in this passionate love, a person no longer remains of any use. Moreover, it is accepted that the best works of the life of this world are not those which relate to individual life; rather, those which relate to collective and national life. Hence, since the Holy Prophet(sa) desired to develop the best possible ability in man so that he may fulfil the responsibilities which related to the collective life of humanity, for this reason, in certain circumstances and under special conditions, he permitted the practice of polygamy. Furthermore, in doing so, the Holy Prophet(sa) gave the relationship between husband and wife such a form, that a person does not become completely preoccupied in it. According to this principle, the polygamy practiced by the Holy Prophet(sa) was for the purpose of weakening personal ties, and not for the purpose of strengthening them. As such, the response which the Holy Prophet(sa) gave to his wives upon their asking for wealth is a testimony to this very fact. Furthermore, it also demonstrates that not only did the Holy Prophet(sa) desire to devote his own attention towards God and his office of Prophethood, rather, even with respect to his wives, his heart desired that their relationship with him should also be wholly for the sake of the hereafter. Therefore, the polygamy of the Holy Prophet(sa) was in the interest of religion, nation and country. In these circumstances, most definitely, this was a great sacrifice of individual gain made by the Holy Prophet(sa). By creating a state of immense hardship and difficulty in his domestic life, the Holy Prophet(sa) made it easier for himself to fulfil those responsibilities which fell upon him in his capacity as a law-giver, religious reformer and leader. Therefore, this action of the Holy Prophet(sa) is deserving of the gratitude of every such person, who in the likeness of wild beasts, does not only care for his own carnal desires and individual or personal gain; rather, considers the reformation and progress of moral, spiritual, national and collective life as being his prime objective.

At the time of her marriage, Ḥaḍrat Ḥafṣah(ra) was approximately twenty-one years of age. After Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishah(ra), since she was the daughter of an individual who was the most eminent from among the Companions, she holds a special rank among the Azwāj-e-Muṭahharāt.10 She also possessed a close relationship with Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishah(ra), and except for the odd disagreement, which is nothing out of the ordinary in such relationships, both of them lived together very lovingly. Ḥaḍrat Ḥafṣah(ra) knew how to read and write. As such, there is a narration in the Aḥādīth11 that she learned to write from a lady Companion named Shifā’ bint ‘Abdillāh(ra). She passed away in 45 A.H., when she was more or less, sixty-three years of age.