In Islām, marriage has been declared obligatory, and except in the case of a disability, celibacy is forbidden. Therefore, the Holy Prophetsa states:
اَلنِّكَاحُ مِنْ سُنَّتِیْ فَمَنْ لَمْ یَعْمَلْ بِسُنَّتِیْ فَلَیْسَ مِنِّیْ
Meaning, “To marry is part of my Sunnat, and he who does not follow my Sunnat is not from among me.”1
Marriage for a prophet, a law-bearing prophet at that, is especially necessary, not only that he may set a model of superior domestic relations before his community, but also that his wives may facilitate the teaching of religious injunctions. The skill, by which a woman can perform the demonstration and education of affairs relevant to women, cannot be done by a man in the same way. As a matter of fact, if there is no hindrance, a prophet should, as far as possible, marry more than once, so that the task of preaching and educating can be further facilitated. Therefore, we see that a majority of the earlier prophets (on whom be peace), practised polygamy. A majority of the prophets of the Banī Isrā’īl were those who had more than one wife.2 It is strange that Christians accuse the Holy Prophetsa and Muslims on account of this issue, but they do not stop to cast a glance at their own holy men, who they believe to be the intimate and chosen messengers of God. Similarly, the prophets of other nations also practised polygamy.3 Therefore, it is the custom of prophets (on whom be peace) to marry, and if possible, more than once. For this reason, after the demise of Ḥaḍrat Khadījahra, considering his office of prophethood, the prompt thought of a second marriage was a natural instinct for the Holy Prophetsa. However, in such circumstances, the selection of a wife is not an easy undertaking for a prophet, for many things must be observed, and many perspectives considered. Therefore, the Holy Prophetsa prayed to Allāh the Exalted, that He may be a guide and leader in this matter. Thus, Allāh the Exalted accepted the prayer of the Holy Prophetsa, and informed him of His selection through a dream. Hence, it is mentioned in Ḥadīth that during these days, the Holy Prophetsa saw a dream in which Gabrielas came before him, presented him with a green silk handkerchief, and said, “This is your wife, in this world and in the hereafter.” When the Holy Prophetsa looked at this handkerchief, upon it was the picture of ‘Ā’ishahra bint Abū Bakrra.4
Shortly thereafter, Khaulah bint Ḥakīmra, the wife of ‘Uthmān bin Maẓ‘ūnra presented herself before the Holy Prophetsa and said, “O Messenger of Allāh, why do you not marry?” “Whom shall I marry?” responded the Holy Prophetsa. She responded, “If you wish there is an unmarried girl and a widow as well.” The Holy Prophetsa inquired, “Who?” Khaulahra responded, “The unmarried girl is the daughter of your friend Abū Bakrra named ‘Ā’ishahra, and the widow is Saudah bint Zam‘ahra, who was married to your late servant Sakrān bin ‘Amrra.” The Holy Prophetsa said, “Alright, make a proposal to the both of them.” Therefore, Khaulara first took a proposal to Ḥaḍrat Abū Bakrra and his wife Ummi Rummānra. At first, they were both astonished and said, “How is this possible? The Holy Prophetsa is our brother.”5 But when the Holy Prophetsa sent word that spiritual brotherhood does not affect physical relations, what objection could they have had? Rather, what greater happiness could they have received than for their daughter to be married to the Messenger of God? After this, Khaulahra approached Ḥaḍrat Saudah bint Zam‘ahra and her relatives were also at consent. Consequently, in Shawwāl 10 Nabawī, the Holy Prophetsa was married to the both of them at a dowry of 400 dirham, and along with Ḥaḍrat Saudah’sra marriage, her farewell ceremony was also held immediately thereafter. However, since at the time of her marriage, Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishahra was only seven years of age, her farewell ceremony was delayed until after the migration.6
At this place, it should be remembered that the place which was vacated in the home of the Holy Prophetsa by the demise of Ḥaḍrat Khadījahra, was actually filled by Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishahra. The actual proposal of the Holy Prophetsa was to Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishahra, and she was also the one shown to him in his dream. His marriage to Ḥaḍrat Saudahra was for a special purpose and due to a specific requirement. This era was an era of severe hardship and suffering for the Muslims. The hatchets of oppression and violence were being slashed against the Muslim men, women and children by the vicious Quraish. These were days of extreme torture, especially for the weak and helpless. Therefore, in such circumstances, the Holy Prophetsa did not like that this hurt and grief-stricken widow be left without care and be subjected to days of torment due to Islām. Moreover, since the Holy Prophetsa also needed to demonstrate a practical lesson in mutual love, sympathy and support among the Muslims, when Saudahra was mentioned before the Holy Prophetsa, without any hesitation whatsoever, he decided to take her into his shadow of benevolence. This was a sacrifice by the Holy Prophetsa which was made as per the circumstances at hand, because, firstly, Saudahra was a widow. Secondly, she was quite aged, such as shortly after her marriage, she became incapable of intercourse. Thirdly, she possessed no distinctive qualities either, which qualified her to the spousal partnership of the Holy Prophetsa, nor was there any special reason for attraction. Then, most of all, marrying her meant that the Holy Prophetsa was bringing a second wife in addition to the one, who became his wife by the divine selection of God Himself, and whom for this reason, the Holy Prophetsa loved dearly. Any individual can understand that no one weds another wife in addition to such a beloved one, without an extraordinary reason. Therefore, marriage to an aged woman like Ḥaḍrat Saudahra with the presence of Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishahra, evidently indicates that this was not (God-forbid) an arrangement for pleasure and lust, which the Holy Prophetsa was bringing into his home. Quite the contrary, it was a sacrifice by the Holy Prophetsa in light of the circumstances at hand.
Hence, the actual and lasting proposal of the Holy Prophetsa was for Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishahra, with regards to whom God Almighty had Himself given a decision. Moreover, she was most suitable for the Holy Prophetsa because:
First: She was a young girl, and for this reason, she was fully able to learn the teachings of Islām quickly, easily, and well, so as to become a religious teacher, which was necessary for the wife of a law-bearing prophet.
Second: She was extremely sharp and intelligent, due to which she was very befitting for the learning of religious matters and for the understanding of religion.
Third: Since she was young, it was anticipated that she would live for long, an anticipation which was in fact fulfilled. In this way, she would receive a longer opportunity to educate, train and preach among the Muslim women.
Fourth: She was born into Islām, due to which the teachings of Islām were part of her life since childhood. From the time of her birth, she learned Islāmic habits and customs and was a very fine model of Islāmic teachings.
Fifth: After the Holy Prophetsa, she was the daughter of the Awwalul-Mu’minīn7 and the Afḍalul-Muslimīn8, due to which her training was extremely outstanding and absolute, and was in complete accordance with the Islāmic traditions. For this reason, she was particularly suitable to become a model for the women.
Due to these reasons, Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishahra was the most suitable of all to become the wife of the Holy Prophetsa. It is due to these very reasons that Allāh the Exalted selected her for the Holy Prophetsa. Consequently, these qualities brought forth their fruits and we see that the community of Muḥammadsa acquired extraordinary benefit from the person of Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishahsa. The portion of Aḥādīth which directly relate to the issues of women are, for the most part, based on the sayings and narrations of Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishahra. Not only this, she also possesses a great status in general religious matters as well. Hence, it is narrated:
كَانَ الْاَكَابِرُ مِنْ صَحابَةِ النَّبِیِّ صَلّی اللّٰهُ عَلَیْهِ وَسَلَّمَ یَرْجِعُوْنَ اِلیٰ قَوْلِھَا وَیَسْتَفْتُوْنَھَا
Meaning, “Even the eminent companions of the Holy Prophetsa would turn to the sayings of Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishahra, and would seek religious verdicts from her.”9
Therefore, the actual and long-term proposal of the Holy Prophetsa was for Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishahra, and she was most worthy of this lofty position. Now remains the marriage of Ḥaḍrat Saudah bint Zam‘ahra. Hence, as we have alluded to above, that this was a sacrifice of the Holy Prophetsa. This marriage was governed by a unique principle of guardianship, which is conclusive evidence of the heart-felt love, affection and true mercy of the Holy Prophetsa, which he extended to his servants and their relatives. This is not limited to the marriage of Ḥaḍrat Saudahra alone, and we shall see as we proceed further that following the demise of Ḥaḍrat Khadījahra, with the exception of Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishah’sra marriage, which was intended in itself, the rest of the marriages of the Holy Prophetsa took place under special circumstances, certain requirements and particular wisdoms. Moreover, the dream of the Holy Prophetsa also expresses the same concept, in which only the picture of Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishahra was shown to him, and the following words were said, “Now this is your wife in this world and in the hereafter.” It is for this reason that the Holy Prophetsa especially loved Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishahra. Therefore, there is a narration that on one occasion someone asked the Holy Prophetsa, اَیُّ النَّاسِ اَحَبُّ اِلَیْكِ meaning “O Messenger of Allāh! From among the people, whom do you love most?” The Holy Prophetsa responded, “‘Ā’ishah.” He asked, “O Messenger of Allāh! Who is it from among the men?” The Holy Prophetsa responded, اَبُوھَا “The father of ‘Ā’ishah.”10
The marriage of Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishahra and Ḥaḍrat Saudahra took place in Shawwāl 10 Nabawī. According to general narrations, Ḥaḍrat Saudah’sra marriage ceremony took place a few days prior to the marriage of Ḥaḍrat ‘Ā’ishahra. At that time, the Holy Prophetsa was fifty years of age.
1 Sunan Ibni Mājah, Kitābun-Nikāḥ, Bābu Mā Jā’a fī Faḍlin-Nikāḥ, Ḥadīth No. 1846
2 For example, study the lives of Abrahamas, Isaacas, Jacobas, Mosesas, Davidas and Solomonas (Author)
3 For example, study the lives of Krishnaas, Rāmchandar Jīas, etc. (Author)
4 * Ṣaḥīḥ Bukhārī, Kitābu Manāqibil-Anṣar, Bābu Tazwījin-Nabiyyisa ‘Ā’ishata......, Ḥadīth No. 3895
* Usdul-Ghābah, Volume 6, p. 193, Dhikru ‘Ā’ishata binti Abī Bakriṣ-Ṣiddīqra, Dārul-Fikr, Beirut (2003)
5 Until this time, the companions of the Holy Prophetsa considered their relationship with him as brotherhood, but they later realized that this relationship was not of brotherhood rather, it was of son and father. However, this spiritual relationship does not affect physical ones. (Author)
6 * Sharḥul-‘Allāmatiz-Zarqānī ‘alal-Mawāhibil-Ladunniyyah, By Muḥammad bin ‘Abdul-Bāqī Az-Zarqānī, Volume 4, pp. 382-383, Bābu ‘Ā’ishata Ummil-Mu’minīn, Dārul-Kutubil-‘Ilmiyyah, Beirut, Lebanon, First Edition (1996)
* Usdul-Ghābah, Volume 6, pp. 191-192, Dhikru ‘Ā’ishata binti Abī Bakriṣ-Ṣiddīqra, Dārul-Fikr, Beirut (2003)
7 The First of the Believers (Publishers)
8 The Best of the Muslims (Publishers)
9 Zādul-Ma‘ād, Al-Ḥāfiẓ Ibni Qayyim Al-Jawzī ‘Abdur-Raḥmān bin ‘Alī bin Muḥammad, Volume 1, p. 26, Faṣlun Fī Azwājihīsa, Egypt
10 Sunan At-Tirmidhī, Kitābul-Manāqib, Bābu Faḍli ‘Ā’ishah, Ḥadīth No. 3890