Importance of Kindness Toward Close Familial Ties

Explaining the importance of close familial ties, Hazrat Khaliftul Masih V (may Allah be his Helper said:

“Then there is (silla rehmi), people who are related to one another should try to promote a bond of love and friendship. Therein lies success. What is (silla rehmi)? Women should care for their own relatives and have good relationship with their husband’s family. Mothers-in-law should feel affection for their daughters-in-law and care for their relatives. Create an environment of love and care so that the Jama’at can progress faster than before. Blessing of Allah the Exalted comes with unity and love and not with in-fighting and dissension. Strive to get blessings of Allah the Exalted.”

(Address delivered on 2 November 2008 at the annual Ijtema of Lajna UK)

On another occasion Huzoore Anwer said the following in the same context:

“The Promised Messiah (on whom be peace) said that family ties do not signify just one’s own familial relations or one’s own blood relations, rather, the respective familial or blood relations of both the husband and wife become each other’s close relations after marriage; that is, the husband’s parents, brothers and sisters become the wife’s parents, brothers and sisters. Similarly, the wife’s parents, brothers and sisters become the husband’s parents, brothers and sisters. If this perspective is taken, relationships can never grow apart and can never suffer. Therefore, it is stated that both the husband and wife should discharge rights due to these people as they would to their own relations: the mother, father, brothers and sisters. This commandment is not just for young women, rather, as I have said, to sustain a relationship young men have also been commanded, as have young women, to pray and be patient. Likewise, it is the obligation of both sides of in-laws not to create friction in marital relations and destroy the peace and harmony of society by giving wrong advice or saying inappropriate things to the young man and young woman.

“Similarly, the first verse also gives the lesson that good upbringing of the offspring resulting from a marriage is obligatory on both parents, so as to ensure the continuation of a generation in the future that will promote virtues in society. It is stated that this will not be possible unless one adopts righteousness (–taqwa). And what is Allah’s taqwa? Allah’s taqwa is to do everything in accordance with His commands, to leave aside all of one’s personal desires and to only, and solely keep in view the objective of trying to please God.

“Allah the Exalted says, Remember, I cannot be deceived for I am watching over each act, each deed of yours at all times.’ Thus, if Ahmadi couples keep this commandment in mind, they will also be enabled to look for those instructions that will attain pleasure of God. Allah the Exalted has mentioned the word righteousness (–taqwa) five times in the nikah verse. It is therefore not possible that the household which keeps righteousness in view to this extent will ever be the mainstay of conflict, or that conflict, fights and quarrels can arise in it. Similarly, one who has regard for close familial ties, who has regard for each other’s relations and cares for them, has been given the glad-tiding of acceptance of prayers therein.”

(Address delivered on 4 October 2009 at annual Ijtema Lajna UK)

The Quranic verses Huzoore Anwer (may Allah be his Helper) chose for recitation before his address to ladies at Jalsa Salana UK 2011 were the verses which are read at the time of nikah. Thus, Huzoore Anwer said in his address:

“At times one issue is raised a lot in our marital problems that come to the fore, by both men and women, and that is that one of them disparages the other’s parents or siblings. Men accuse women and women accuse men of belittling their parents, saying such and such about them and being abusive about them. This is remote from righteousness and creates discord in families. It is not a matter of only making accusations, at times these turn out to be the truth where children are provoked against their grandparents and improper words are used for each other’s close relatives and efforts are made to turn children against them. Allah the Exalted states this is remote from righteousness and this is not righteousness and here you are becoming far removed from righteousness. Therefore, be careful of your (rehmi–familial) relations as well.

“These verses also draw attention to this. The very first verse enjoins to take care of one’s (rehmi) relations. Rather than only be considerate themselves, parents should also teach their children the sanctity and respect of rehmi relations. Then only can a pure society be established. Indeed, parents should take great care for the sanctity of this because the examples of parents influence children.”

(Address delivered on 23 July 2011 at Jalsa Salana UK)